Dear Expectant Mother,
We are a happy, active family from the San Francisco Bay Area of California. Our son, Julian, is 7 years old, and he wants to be a big brother as much as we want to be parents to another child. We want this letter to give you a snapshot of who we are and how we live our lives, and we hope after reading it, you might be moved to learn more about us.
We admire the decision you are making—it is a brave and generous choice. We are truly grateful to you for considering us as prospective parents.
Who We Are
We met in 2004 at work, and began dating in 2005. We married just 18 months later—when you know, you know! Our families say we are one of those couples that brings out the best in each other. After ten years of marriage, we are closer than ever and our house is full of love. We’re a family of three, truly hoping to be four. We were able to have our child, Julian, a few years into our marriage, but have since learned that we are unable to have another biological child. We have always wanted
a big family, and hope to complete our family through adoption.
We spend a lot of time outdoors in our glorious weather. Every afternoon after school we swim in Nonna’s pool, hike the Marin headlands (a beautiful national recreational area near San Francisco), ride bikes along the river or shoot hoops on our patio. We grow lots of fruit and vegetables in our back yard and love to plan dinner by going into the garden and seeing what’s ready to eat.
About Cari, by Nik
Cari grew up in the Midwest, where she was a competitive figure skater. She is very close to her family and has an older sister with three amazing kids. Her dad has a great sense of humor and her mom has an enormous heart, and she shares both these features with them. She did a lot of traveling growing up and went to 47 of the US states before she was 12! Her dad was a sailor, so every summer they would tow his boat around the country behind their van and go camping.
Cari went to college on the east coast, then moved to California. She works part time from home as a Creative Director for clients like Disney, Nike and Apple. Together, we also cofounded a company called Tinkering Labs that designs tinkering kits for kids. The kits help them learn how to build amazing creations with real life parts and how to persist and solve their own problems.
It would be impossible to list all the things I love about Cari. If I were to pick two, it would be how loving and caring she is, and her passion for life. She opens her heart to our son Julian and me, as well as to all our family and friends. She is always helping out those in need, and that includes volunteering her time with the local mothers’ club and the school PTA. I also love her passion and desire to enjoy life. Whether it’s doing things to the fullest (like climbing a mountain to watch the eclipse) or having the best time while doing it (like staying up late playing board games and keeping everyone laughing), Cari makes sure that everyone will get the most joy possible out of the experience. She inspires me and everyone around her to be a better person and live a richer and fuller life.
About Nik, by Cari
Nik was born and raised in Kobe, Japan, which has given him a broader outlook on life and a very strong work ethic. His family had a chocolate company there, with a big factory and several stores in Tokyo, Osaka, Kyoto and Kobe. Although his dad is retired now, he still makes us cookies and truffles and homemade Nutella! Nik is the middle of three brothers, and is always the peacemaker, bringing the family together. His parents are so warm and involved and loving, as is Nik.
Nik came to the US to attend college in California, where he got both a Bachelor’s degree and a Master’s degree. He’s a technical genius (I swear!) and works as a Senior Product Manager at the Silicon Valley tech company, Oracle. He loves helping people solve problems and has a flexible schedule that allows him to spend a lot of time at home with us.
Nik is the kindest, most patient, most generous man I’ve ever met. The night before our wedding, his aunt told me the story of when his grandmother was sick. His mother was living in Japan and could not be there to help, so as a recent college grad, he moved in with his grandmother as her caregiver and spent endless nights in the hospital taking care of her. His aunt wanted me to know that he would always be there for me and our kids no matter what. He is loyal, loving, responsible, super smart and incredibly patient. And he is an amazing father that always makes time to help Julian with homework, coach his Little League team, build forts and giant Lego creations, go for bike rides, hunt caterpillars and share parenting duties.
Our Son, Julian
At 7 years old, Julian is goofy, sweet, energetic and very social. He loves swimming, basketball and science. He really, really wants a brother or sister and asks us for one regularly. There’s nothing we all want more.
He loves school and his teacher describes him as “happy, well-adjusted, outgoing, funny, very bright, and a good friend.” He is so, so sweet and very excited to become a big brother!
We live in Marin County, just north of the Golden Gate Bridge—just 15 minutes from San Francisco and 20 minutes from the beach. Our schools are graded “A” and are top of the line. Our home has views of a nearby mountain and the San Francisco Bay, with a large patio and nice flat yard for kids to play. We are fully stocked on baby gear, and our third bedroom is just waiting to be filled with noise and toys and lots of love. We have the sweetest golden retriever ever—Kuma is a 10-year-old rescue who had a tough life to start, but is now happy and loved.
We love to travel and explore. We often stay at a family house in Lake Tahoe (about a three to four hour drive into the mountains) in both summer and winter. We visit Nik’s parents at a house they rent in France every summer. In the last few years, we’ve also gone to Japan, Switzerland, Croatia and Portugal. Cari’s family has a home in Wyoming near Jackson Hole, as well as one in Hilton Head, South Carolina which we visit regularly. They also have a beach house in Rhode Island, where we spend a few weeks each summer with extended family.
Family is very important to us. Nik’s parents and two brothers (and their kids) live less than ten minutes away and we see them at least once a week. Three aunts and uncles also live nearby, and we have cousins everywhere—you get the picture! Cari’s parents and sister visit several times a year from Ohio, Wyoming and Seattle. Both of our families are incredibly supportive of our decision to adopt, and eagerly await another member of the family.
We believe in balance in parenting, as in everything else in life. We love to have fun, but balancing that with learning to work hard is important to a successful life, so Julian does chores like cleaning his room and helping in the kitchen. Cari works part-time from home while Julian is at school, so she is able spend a lot of time with Julian. Nik is home by 6 pm every day to shoot hoops with Julian and eat family dinners on the patio. Education is a top priority—and we will make it possible for our children to attend college if that is what they wish. We teach Julian generosity, empathy, and the importance of treating all others with manners, respect and kindness and plan to do the same for our second child.
Thank you for considering us!
There is no way for me to put into words how much I appreciate that
you are considering our family. I will forever be thankful to you.
Should you choose us to be this baby’s family, we promise to give this
child a happy life filled with joy and the love of family all around.
I really want a little brother or sister. Mama says to be prepared because they’ll
be a baby and cry a lot, but I told her they won’t be a baby forever. And then I’ll
have a real brother or sister and we can both grow up to be Batman.
We hope to hear from you!
We can be reached toll-free at 800-392-4152 or by email at firstname.lastname@example.org. You can also reach our warm and helpful adoption attorneys, Karin Stoeckenius and Holly Wotherspoon by phone or email:
Or, visit their website at www.adamsromer.com
With love and gratitude,
Cari, Nik and Julian