Thank you for taking the time to read our letter and getting to know a bit about us. We admire your strength, and respect this difficult choice you’ve made, which takes such courage and love. We hope to have the opportunity to know you, and that this letter will be the beginning of that.
Our Lives Together:
We’ve been married nine years, together a few more. We met in grad school in Wisconsin, where we both studied English Literature. We started dating right after we met, and five years later, we got married in a classic movie theater. We planned on becoming English professors, but life had other plans. After a few years teaching in Louisiana, we decided we’d be a lot happier in California, where Amy’s from and where her mom still lives. We’ve settled for keeps in the Oakland hills, sharing our space with our rescue animals: two very child-friendly huskies, Zora and Gus; and three cats, Fiona, Edwina, and Mahfouz.
Most days we both work from home. David is starting his fourth year teaching for Stanford University’s Online High School. It’s a great place to work, and because his classes are online, he can teach from anywhere-usually from home. Amy works for a local educational-technology company, which offers flexible hours and telecommuting.
During the day, we take the dogs on a long walk or hike-often in our local park, which has hiking trails and bustling playgrounds. We also enjoy meeting up with friends for dinner or having them over, going to a local farmers’ market, or getting to know some new corner of the East Bay. There’s a lot to discover! Around our home, Amy enjoys gardening in our yard. We cook dinner-Amy loves making Indian, Asian, and Latin American dishes, and trying new recipes. We often watch a movie in the evening. (Amy also studied film, and she writes a film blog.). Of course, one of our passions is reading. Amy still has all her favorite books from childhood, which she looks forward to sharing with our child.
We enjoy travel. Our best friends are in South Carolina and we visit when we can. We’ve been to Turkey with Amy’s mom, the Netherlands with friends, and want to go to Iceland. Amy’s parents traveled with her when she was little, and we hope to give our child the same opportunity.
I’m from the rural South, a 10th generation North Carolinian. Growing up, life for me and my sisters was mostly school, church, and farm work, and I appreciate the values my upbringing taught me: hard work, honesty, self-sacrifice, and the importance of family. They taught me how different good people can be. I’m from the first generation of my family to go to college. I visit at least once a year, and I’m looking forward to teaching my child how to cook collards and catfish and biscuits and such.
David by Amy:
David is the most loyal person I know. He’s incredibly devoted to me, his family, his pets, and as a lifelong teacher, to his students’ well-being. What first attracted me was his sense of humor and his crazy-smart brain. (When he was little he read encyclopedias.) David is also the most ethical person I know; his convictions are deeply held and carefully thought-out. He’s always incredibly supportive of me when life gets tough. David’s Southern roots are a deep part of who he is-classic country music, grits and biscuits, good manners. David loves hanging out at home with the dogs and watching old movies with me. He keeps up with local and national politics, and still does academic work, occasionally giving talks at conferences and publishing articles.
I know David will make an amazing dad-fun, loyal and protective. He grew up around a lot of children in his family, so he’s diapered and burped and coped with colic. He enjoys caring for children, and he’s a natural teacher. David will love answering questions and helping our child pursue his or her interests. And he’ll have fun doing kid things with our child, such as watching cartoons and playing sports.
I grew up in Culver City, southern California, in a small, close-knit family: my parents, my grandmother, and me. I was very close to my dad, a Spanish-literature professor at UCLA, who passed away in 2007. My mom (an elementary school teacher for thirty-five years), and I email each other every day, talk on the phone, and visit regularly. Keeping in contact with my friends-some from as far back as elementary school-is also very important to me. My parents gave me a sense of security for exploring the world. They wanted me to have a good education, and enjoy life. I was raised to care about other people, no matter how different from me they are. They played games with me, took me to museums, parks, movies, the library, and on my dad’s trips to Spain. I look forward to doing the same for our child. My mom plans to move in with us in the future, so our child will have a live-in grandma for support and additional cuddling and goofing around.
Amy by David:
Amy is the best person I know. She’s smart, funny, and adventurous, but she’s also responsible and organized. Amy has always lived with the sense that the whole world is out there for her-and us-to experience. She’s interesting and interested: books, movies, food, gardening, and travel-she’s always looking for something to keep her mind active and growing. Over the years she has done tons of work to make life better and richer for other people, working and giving at libraries, blood drives, and animal shelters.
Amy has so much love to give, and she will shower that love on our child and help him or her build a good, full, lively life, like she’s done for me. I think the most important thing Amy will give a child, along with her love, is resilience. She’s about five feet tall, but ferociously strong. Life hasn’t been all sunshine and lollipops, but we’ve come through the hard times together. She’ll bring that to our child.
Our three-bed, two-bath house is in the Oakland hills in Northern California. We’re ten minutes from everything-parks, grocery stores, restaurants-and we have an amazing view of the San Francisco Bay and the hills. We picked our home with our future child in mind: it has open space with lots of light and a big backyard. We are putting in a grass play area and a large edible garden. It’s important to us that the garden is also a place for kids to play, and not an off-limits “adult” space. We want to have a yard that’s popular with neighborhood kids.
One of the main reasons we settled in the Bay Area is because we believe strongly in diversity. Raising children in a multicultural environment lets them know people who are different from them, and gives them the stimulation and fun of seeing other cultures. And a kid should get to eat dim-sum and empanadas and tikka masala and real burritos-we love good food. We also love being close to so much culture-museums, live music, botanical gardens, old movies at the Paramount Theater, Fairyland on Lake Merritt-all things we look forward to sharing with a child.
Kids need to know they’re loved no matter what, and to feel safe exploring. We both believe that learning is a natural instinct for children, and that’s an interest we want to cultivate. We want our child to be curious and someone who wants to leave a place better than he or she found it. Most of all, we want to raise our child to be happy and confident-someone who knows we’ll always be there, but who will grow up to be a strong and independent adult. We’ll do everything we can to help our child grow into the best version of whoever he or she chooses to be.
Thank you for taking the time to read our letter. If you choose us, please know that we’ll provide the best loving home for your baby that we can, with out deepest gratitude and respect for your choice. But whomever you choose, we wish you peace.
You can reach us toll-free at 1-888-479-4141 or email us at email@example.com. If you prefer, you can contact our friendly adoption attorneys, Karin Stoeckenius and Holly Wotherspoon, at 1-800-U-Adopt-US (1-800-823-6788) or at firstname.lastname@example.org. You can visit their website at www.adamsromer.com.